Friday 5 September 2014

Moving Back In With The Parents

When I moved out of my mum's house almost 10 years ago I never thought in a million years that I would find myself back there.

But here I am, sat on my mum's sofa writing this post.

Unfortunately our landlord decided to sell our house earlier this year and this meant we needed to find somewhere else to rent.

Trouble with 4 children we couldn't just move into any home.

At the minimum we needed atleast a 3 bedroom house with 2 double rooms, something that seemed to be hard to come by.

And even when we did find houses that appeared suitable, they were either too expensive, too far away or just in unacceptable condition.

The council weren't willing to help because according to them, Justin earns too much.

After a lot of hunting and unsuccessful viewings, Justin's dad very kindly offered to help us out with the money for a depsosit to buy our own place.

Some good news at last.

However, even if we found a property we liked, the whole process of buying a house, even if chain free, could take a minimum of 8 weeks.

So far we've had two properties fall through, stressed would be an understatement.

Our deadline to leave our home was the 29th August.

I've spent most of the Summer holidays packing up our belongings, this has left me feeling like I've let the girls down, I haven't spent nearly as much time doing things with them as I should have.

And with no home to move to yet, we've been left homeless and we were left with no option but to squeeze into my mum's home.

The girls see this as a little adventure.

Not quite my thoughts, this is definitely not where I pictured myself thinking 10 years into the future when I was eighteen.

Justin and I are back to sleeping in my box room on a single mattress on the floor and the girls are all having to share a room, bed times are certainly "fun" right now.

Majority of our belongings are stored in different family members houses, I can't just reach for something when I want it.

I know there are plenty of people on worse situations than us but living with my mum really isn't ideal.

I love her but there was a second reason for leaving home to begin with, apart from the fact that I was pregnant at the time, my mum and I clash big time, I'm just waiting for round one!!

Thing is, she has done as a huge favour by allowing us in her home, something that I don't think I will ever be able to repay so I'm trying not to get in her way, trying not to ruin a routine that she already has, trying to not impose but it is proving difficult.

An added complication, she works nights, so keeping the girls quiet duing the day is a difficult task.

Getting used to where certain things are kept and how different appliances works, even though I've lived there before, I feel like I'm starting from scratch.

Old but new.

I'm trying to think of the positives right now.

* I have a live in babysitter.

* My mum loves to iron so this saves me a job .

* The house is at the top of a great big hill, I'm thinking I might lose some weight whilst doing the school run.

* We are able to save some money.

I've always tried to believe that everything happens for a reason but my belief is fading right now.

When we are in our very own home, I'm sure I will be able to look back on these next few months and maybe not laugh but see that it wasn't all bad.

It's just right now I'm struggling, I mean would you move back in with your parents??

xxxx

13 comments:

  1. I don't think I could move back in with my mum, don't think I would cope x but for some ppl its whats best and they find things easy x good luck fining a new home

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  2. Sounds quite stressful lovely, but you have the right attitude. It won't be forever will it, and you have a cracking list of positives there. I wouldn't like to move back in with my parents but sometimes you have to do what you have to do and I am sure that you will all be much better off for it in the long run :) x

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    1. very true!! and hey another positive my mum just bought me a bottle of wine for cooking dinner for her all week :)

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  3. This sounds so similar to the situation we were in last year. We got the notice letter from our landlord the day we got back from holiday and had to be out on our wedding anniversary a few months later. I rang my mum and burst into tears! There was no way we could afford to move house AGAIN. My parents in law helped us out with our deposit and we managed to buy a house, but there were several months in between renting and buying when we were essentially homeless.

    My husband stayed in Birmingham with his Mum, and I took the girls 4 hours drive away to my parents in Cornwall. We saw him once or twice a month and it was hard, but they had a lot of fun with their Grandparents that they normally only see a handful of times a year. It got easier after the first few weeks as we got into a routine and it was actually a bit weird when we all moved back in together into our new house!

    I had never envisioned moving back in with my parents either, but it was OK. The sleeping arrangements were a bit better than you are having to deal with.. other than my husband being missing! I hope it all works out for you as well as it did for us - 5 months after we moved in and Georgie is still telling people she "loves our new house!"

    Good luck x

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  4. We moved in with my folks for 4 and a half months while we had major work done on the house 3 years ago. Everyone joked about my poor hubby living with the in-laws, but I think I found it harder than him - it was like I regressed to being 13 again living under their roof!! I think it's even more difficult with kids as you've got your own routine and you're not used to having to work around someone else. Really hope something comes up soon for you guys, good luck x

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  5. Omg! That sounds stressful! Hope you get a house sorted out soon :) xx

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  6. Oh gosh, sounds very stressful. I hope you get to move back into a home of your own very soon. I don't think I could move back in with mine. I love going to stay with them (they live far away) but not permanently. Big hugs xx

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  7. Don't beat yourself up. I would move back if I had a deposit to start house hunting with like you. Absolutely a practical thing to do. Plus there is light at the end of the tunnel with your own home.

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  8. Oh hun :/ I kmow how stressed you've been but I've still everything crossed your forever home will become available very very soon.

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  9. I can't imagine how stressful it is! Keep looking forward and enjoy the babysitter x

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  10. I would if I had to. Just think of the extra help like ur ironing being done and being able to save money. And remember it's only for a short time.

    Laura @ www.firsttwothenblue.com

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  11. its not your fault, life happens and sometimes it stinks When my daughter came up 7 years ago for a 2 week holiday here oh decided he did not want her back, and so we gained 3 lodgers. Having them there for a 2 week holiday was great, having them move in lock stock and barrel was a nightmare Like you we clashed, and her ways are so different to mine. She drove oh up the wall with her messiness and lazyness, but we all survived it.
    For me at the end of the day the upside was I now have them all on my doorstep 2 mins away instead of 200 miles away. She is settled, happier than she ever was, has a fab now husband and of course the twins - so yes everything does happen for a reason

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